3 Ways Women Can Embody Male Energy In Their Businesses And Increase Their Profits
by Sheri McConnell

One of the best things about starting and growing a business is how much you get to grow as a person.  Taking a business from start-up to six-figures and way beyond requires a lot of energy–specifically female and male energy. As with all things in the universe, balance is again the key.  In business, you will reach profits faster when you can embody both female and male energy in your business.

As a married women with four children and the coach to hundreds of women and men over the last decade, I have been observing the differences between men and women (and boys and girls too) and I love asking the question: What is different and how did it affect their results? There is so much we can learn from each other, you only need to have the intention to do so.  And even though this article is directed toward women, men only need to read and flip the lessons to grow their businesses too.

Here are three ways women can embody male energy in their business and increase their profits:

One- Men Ask Themselves “How Will I Make Money Today?”

The first main difference I notice between male and female business owners is that men move faster and are more focused on answering this question: “How will I make money today?” whereas women tend to be too shy or take way too long to get to this question.  Since men often have their identities connected to this question, they get right to business figuring it out and thus are profitable sooner.  Women on the other hand have multiple identities (no joke intended!) and wear so many hats that they hardly have time to get focused enough on one identity.  And because women are known for this, we often have to prove ourselves far longer to men before they will support us. Sound familiar?

What I have witnessed: When women are able to clear away the clutter (see the next two points below) and focus on the answers to this question, they are unstoppable.  Because they naturally embody the female energy of connection, trust, and empathy; they are able to move at lightning speed in their business because they focus on “How to make meaningful money today?”.  I am smart and lucky enough to surround myself with women who balance their male and female energy well and their businesses as does mine bypassed many of our male counterparts a long time ago.  All men have to do is put some of that female “meaningful” energy into their work and they will experience the same results.

Two- Men Delegate Effortlessly

The second difference I see between women and men is the way they delegate. I often say that men come out of the womb delegating while women are naturally caretakers. Since I was lucky enough to have a little boy almost four years ago after three girls, I can say with experience that I think delegating is a male dominate trait.  And yes, I definitely get my husband better after all these years now that I understand he was was just born that way.   Seriously though, balance is what you should strive for in life and in business.  My own struggles were in this area as were many of my clients.

What I have witnessed: The more I delegated and relied on others to reach my life and business goals, the more abundant my life became.  Stephen Covey talks about the difference between being interdependent and independent. Interdependence is the sweet spot because you are able to experience the brilliance of others instead of trying to do everything yourself.  Men get this. They would never try to do all the things a woman tries to do in a single day.  As my clients and I delegated in our businesses over the years, we were able to reach goals that would have never been possible otherwise.

And yes, we girls did have to give up some of our female energy to delegate more.  We had to do less caretaking and not feel guilty about it. Very hard. We had to rely on the “community” to help us raise our children. Hilary Clinton said “It takes a village to raise a child”. I totally agree. I couldn’t run successful businesses without great neighbors to rely on. And if you don’t have children, then know it also takes a virtual village to raise a business too!  Everyone wins when you delegate.  My business is far more successful because there is brilliance pouring into it that I am not capable of producing. And on the home front, my husband is far closer to my children because he is given the opportunity to be their sole caretaker when I travel.

Three- Men So “No” With Ease

The third main difference is how men and women say “no”.  The ease at which men are able to say no is simply astonishing to me.  I think they just process it through one filter: Do I want to do this?

On the flip side, women process the decision through at least half a dozen filters that are something similar to this:

• Can I do it?
• Who will be mad at me if I do it?
• Do I have time to do it?
• I don’t have the right outfit to do it!
• Maybe I shouldn’t even be thinking of doing it?

And the filtering goes on and on until we simply say, YES because it is much easier than saying no.

What I have witnessed: As my clients and I began to say “no” and say it often, we empowered the people we love to step up and say yes and play with us in a meaningful way.  When we began to say no to those things that didn’t bring us and the world as a whole more inner peace, we began to use our new attained free time in smarter ways. We began to create passive income opportunities that allowed us to then delegate more and be able to focus on the question that should be at the tip of every entrepreneur’s lips:  “How will I make meaningful money today?”

Want To Use This Article In Your Ezine or Website? You have my permission, as long as you include this complete blurb with it: Sheri McConnell is the CEO of Sheri McConnell Companies, Inc. and the president and founder of two national organizations, the National Association of Women Writers-NAWW and the Global Institute of Associations-GIA. You can visit Sheri, access her free article archive, and find out more about all four of her companies at www.sherimcconnell.com. Sheri lives in San Antonio, Texas with her husband, their four children, a weenie dog, and two cats.

Watch Your Language: 7 Tips for Big Results
by Christine Kane

A few years ago, I was in a car with the promoter of one of my performances. He had picked me up at the airport and was driving me to my hotel. On the way, we talked guitars. We got onto the subject of Olson Guitars, arguably the best guitar in the whole world. At one point, the promoter said, “Yea, well, in my entire life I’ll never own an Olson guitar.”

There was a time when I’d let a remark like this slide on by, even adding my own “me either” to the mix.

Now, I can’t. Yoda steps into my head and says, (in his Yoda voice) “So certain are you. Always with you it cannot be done.”

So, I turned to the promoter and said, “You are NOT allowed to say that!”

This is because I know the power of language. When you know that words become things, it’s hard to let language slide.

I can’t help it. I have a rule:
Friends don’t let friends speak crappily.

Language is powerful. Words can create reality. Even if my promoter friend doesn’t know how on earth he’d ever get his guitar, it doesn’t mean he should cut off the possibility with his own words.

If you’re wondering how to begin watching your words, here are 7 practical language principles for becoming a better creator of your life.

1 – Eliminate “never” and “always.”
Never and always are words of hysteria. “I always mess everything up!” “I’ll never figure this out!” “I’ll never get an Olson Guitar.”

First off, it’s not true. If you always messed everything up, you wouldn’t have made it out of the womb.

And second off, extreme words are designed to hook you. It’s just your emotions taking a joyride. You’re more powerful than that.

2 – Use AND instead of BUT.
“But” dismisses the statement before it. “And” includes it. For instance, “That’s a good article, but it needs some editing” isn’t nearly as encouraging as “That’s a good article, AND it needs some editing.”

“I love you, but…” is another great example of the dismissive power of “but.”

3 – Avoid “Should.”
Should is a heinous word for many reasons. It is victim-speak. It disempowers its object. It negates desires, thereby making it harder to make choices. It adds a nebulous energy to the decision making process. Use empowered language instead: “I could…” “I would…” “I am choosing to,” “I would like to,” “I don’t want to,” or “You might consider…”

4 – Stop calling yourself depressed.
Also stop allowing anyone to tell you that you are depressed. When you call yourself “depressed” or “obsessive compulsive” or “ADHD” or whatever – you’re claiming this thing. You’re calling it forth with the most powerful two words in our language: “I am.” That creates very little option for the transformation of this condition.

5 – Delete the word “hate” from your vocabulary.
“Hate” has lots of energy. When you use it, you send lots of energy out into the very thing you “hate.” Even if it’s negative energy, it’s still a powerful force, adding its charge to that thing. You’re also depleting this energy from your own spirit as you say it.

6 – Be “great.” Or “wonderful.”
A disease of the creative temperament is a belief that we must be authentic at all costs. So we can’t answer a simple “How are you?” without delving into an in-depth scan of our emotional temperature.

Try this instead: When people ask you how you’re doing, just say, “I’m great!”

I used to think if I said this, then I better have a good reason for saying it, like I just won the lottery or something. I thought it would make me look suspicious, and people would start to wonder if something was wrong with me. But then I did it. And you know what? Most people don’t care why you’re great. You’re saying it for you.

7 – Pay attention to the music of your speech.
You know how some people? They talk in question marks? And you have no idea why? But it makes you think you shouldn’t really rely on them? And it makes you not want to hire them?
The music of your language says a lot about you. If you let your sentences droop like Eeyore, (“Thanks for noticing me.”) or if you do the uncertain question mark language, take note of what attitudes are causing this. These patterns are created for a reason. Even if it feels like faking it at first, generate confidence as you speak.

About the Author:
Performer, songwriter, and creativity consultant Christine Kane publishes her ‘LiveCreative’ weekly ezine with more than 8,000 subscribers. If you want to be the artist of your life and create authentic and lasting success, you can sign up for a FRE*E subscription to LiveCreative at www.christinekane.com.

Lessons Learned During A Year Full of “Growth Opportunities” by Sheri McConnell

This year was an amazing year full of growth opportunities. I know many of you expected me to say challenges, but that truly wasn’t my experience at all. Although I experienced more lessons this year than in some of my previous years online, I welcomed them all as they were coming because I knew my willingness to learn this year would mean I would move even faster once the economy recovered.

Here is a quick inventory of some of the “growth opportunities” I experienced in 2009.

1.  Your Perception of the Economy Is What Matters

Awareness is everything. Your awareness of how you literally have so much potential right inside of you will take you through all economic climates. Sadly, most people just don’t have this awareness yet. All the external factors (our health, our economy, our financial situation) can be perceived in such a way that you can move through them no matter what. It is about being positive and about being aware of the energy and thoughts inside you at any given moment. If in “your world” you perceive you have choices to quit “if this” and “if that” happen, then guess what, you might as well not get started.

I learned this year that if you really want it, you won’t have excuses. And trust me, they are all excuses. We don’t say no to an opportunity because of lack of money, or too much travel, or lack of time… we say no simply because we just don’t want to move forward. And here is the thing. In my opinion, is it OK to not move forward all the time. Nature tells us that we all must go dormant for a period of time to truly flourish again in the future. Being aware that you are choosing to go dormant is OK.  Having the perception that the external things are the reasons not to grow is not OK. Just know when you are ready to flourish, external reasons are not of your concern and you only need to be “aware” and then commit to be able succeed.

2.  Your Boundaries Help Others Grow

They have to test your boundaries to grow. Did you get that? People don’t test your boundaries to hurt you or to take advantage of you. They test them because they are still growing. And they never stop growing. As you can imagine, if you are a coach or consultant or a “coachsultant”, then be prepared to constantly have your boundaries tested.

How do you grow? Your keep working through your own boundaries and tweaking them until you are happy. Yep, it is that easy to be happy. Here are a few areas that I have found having good boundaries will move you forward the fastest:

• Your physical and mental space
• Advice you take
• Access you give
• Problems you take on
• Results of others that you absorb

3.  Your Customers Want YOU–Mind, Body, and Soul

They want balance. This year I really understood at a deep level how to expand and grow past my comfort zone even more. In the previous ten years, I had spent so much time mastering the mind and soul parts of myself and my business that I had in some ways neglected the body. (Sidenote: I had instead given my body to my four children, but that is another article!) This year I realized I had a been subconsciously telling the people I inspire that you can be successful, but you can’t be balanced. I was “showing” them that you can’t have it all when I wasn’t in shape. Once I began to become more balanced in the “Body” area of my life this year by hiring a trainer and paying better attention to what I ate, my clients literally “felt better” too and began to thank me for my hard work.

Here are just a few ways your customers need you to be balanced:

Mind
They need you to provide good content that helps them detect patterns and learn quickly.

Body
They need you to breathe, move gracefully through struggle, and most of all take care of yourself.

Soul
They need you to help them connect their work to the passions of others so they can experience their own “true meaning”.

4.  Your Customers Are a Part of YOU

We are truly all one.  This year I was able to watch how when we take part in “negativity” at all it shrinks us. Even if we react to negativity as a way to decompress or vent, it shrinks us. Even if we don’t participate in the negativity, but allow the energy of it to fill the air we are breathing, it shrinks us. This year I learned that the only way to run a business and to experience a truly amazing life is to live moment-by-moment in the essence that “we are all one”.

Want To Use This Article In Your Ezine or Website? You have my permission, as long as you include this complete blurb with it: Sheri McConnell is the CEO of Sheri McConnell Companies, Inc. and the president and founder of two national organizations, the National Association of Women Writers-NAWW and the Global Institute of Associations-GIA. You can visit Sheri, access her free article archive, and find out more about all four of her companies at www.sherimcconnell.com. Sheri lives in San Antonio, Texas with her husband, their four children, a weenie dog, and two cats.

Three Ways To Redirect Your Ego So You Can Create Positive Change in The World by Sheri McConnell

I grew a lot this year. My bottom line grew 398% and projections are to hit 2.6 million in 2010. But more importantly, on a personal level, I really stepped into my power to create positive change for others. I played a bigger game this year and guess what my results were proportional. But the real reason I know I was able to really rock it this year was because I learned how to redirect my ego and focus on the positive change I am creating in the world. I realized at a deep level that my work is not about me and that I am supposed to use my “stories” to inspire others. And because I got out of my way even more this year, I learned how to think and plan with the realization that we are certainly “all one”.  This realization led my husband and I to come up with the idea during our anniversary dinner to start Smart Women Foundation this month. Below are three ways you can also redirect your ego so you can create positive change for your clients, friends, and family.  And because I realize I am a “student” first and foremost, I also included “ego wisdom” from some of my wonderful friends and followers on Facebook and Twitter. Enjoy!

1. Focus On Positive Results Not The Negative People

When we are focused on the positive results, the actual positive change we can create in the world, our ego has no choice but to go neutral. And since we are operating from awareness outside of our own needs and worries, we are able to let go of negative people and situations much easier. There are many ways to focus on positive results and center your body and mind so the ego becomes neutral. I love the Matrix movies on so many levels. The journey that the main character Neo takes to let go of his ego and focus on the results (the positive change that only he can create, his destiny if you will) is such a great example of what power is in each of us. The Matrix Trilogy comes full circle too when at the end Neo steps into his full power and knows his true purpose. But the journey along the way was full of negativity and downright danger. To deal with the negativity and to foresee danger, he would find his center through meditation and going within for the answers. And did I mention the soundtrack is really cool too!

Jenny Fenig, one of my Twitter followers gave this advice for redirecting ego: Practice yoga; give more, expect less; think of the ego as when you Edge God Out.

And one of my 2009 Mastermind members,  Janice Campbell says that she brackets her day with gratitude to redirect ego. She shared, “There’s nothing more centering than the reality that you have so much to be grateful for. It shifts your focus outward and makes sharing inevitable.”

2. Don’t Worry About Consequences If You Are In Integrity With Your Actions

I have learned that sometimes we have to let go of everything to trust those things which we can’t see. I remember when I was going through my divorce, I felt like all I had was integrity. I didn’t have a penny to feed us, but I had the knowing that I was doing the right thing. I was married to a man with a huge Catholic family and I was all alone. My mom was an orphan and I was an only child and I barely new my dad since I had just met him a few years earlier. Anyway as I stood strong through a 9 month battle to keep my two girls under three at the time, I literally had no one. Both of my parents were not healthy enough mentally or physically to deal with the situation so I moved forward knowing I was doing the right thing even though it felt like I must be wrong because my now ex-husband had 20 people in court with him each and every time we had to go. I would get on the stand each time, shaking, looking into 20 pairs of eyes and then I would begin to speak the truth.

That was the year I learned about integrity and going within to become a strong person. The consequences of my actions to leave an abusive marriage could have cost me my children…  but I knew I was in integrity with my actions and I wasn’t about to let my children grow up in a similar situation my mother had put me in over and over again as she remarried many times during my childhood.

That was 13 years ago and because I took those brave steps in my twenties I gave my children such an amazing life.

In retrospect I am so glad I was all alone, because I was able to let my ego go to work for me and to get my body and mind through a very hard point in my life. Nothing in business or life sense has compared to that year as you could imagine. I think I owe my success to the growth that happened during that year.

In business and in life, I have personally always felt like doing what I knew to be the right thing was way more important than any of the consequences of those actions. I don’t think I could do this without being able to get clear and redirect my ego along the way. In a way, my husband and his family who were trying to take my beautiful children from me because of their egos, allowed me to find my higher self that year. Thank goodness that “truth” eventually surfaces and those who act from integrity move forward in a more peaceful way.

Facebook friend, Kelle Eli and “consciousness” expert, said, “It’s not about squishing the ego, it’s about redirecting it to work FOR the spirit, not contrary to it. So long as you have the concept of one must dominate the other, you will forever attract conflict.”

Alexis Martin Neely, my beautiful 2009 Mastermind buddy says that, “It’s all about awareness. Be aware when you are operating out of fear, grasping, and scarcity. Recognize it’s the ego, thank it for trying to help and decide to operate from your higher self.”

3. Talk About Ideas Not People

“Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people.” –Eleanor Roosevelt

I heard this quote on a teleseminar a while back. I think it was by the intuitive soul, Beath Davis. And I really resonate with the message of it. I think sometimes we go on autopilot and just aren’t aware of how we are letting our ego drive our behaviors and our lives. I have always steered clear of gossip and yes, I have ended up being the “loner” sometimes because of this. I felt so good when I heard the quote because this was exactly how I have been living my life for at least the last ten years (I am 39) and now I know why. I have a “great big mind”!  And I never really realized why I don’t care for the discussion of politics or current events more than a mention.

One the most aware coaches I know, Christine Kane shared with me that “Lots of times we think the ego is the part of us that wants to play big. I have found that the ego doesn’t necessarily love that playing big stuff as much as it loves the attention-getting-make-me-look-good stuff.”   She says, “I find that my ego (god bless her!) gets all stuck in the puffy stuff when my soul (god bless her, too!) isn’t worried about looking good.  AWARENESS is what brings the clarity to know which motivation is driving us.”

I think Eleanor’s quote is so powerful because it brings to question our awareness of how we are creating our lives and our results one behavior at a time.

Want To Use This Article In Your Ezine or Website? You have my permission, as long as you include this complete blurb with it: Sheri McConnell is the CEO of Sheri McConnell Companies, Inc. and the president and founder of two national organizations, the National Association of Women Writers-NAWW and the Global Institute of Associations-GIA. You can visit Sheri, access her free article archive, and find out more about all four of her companies at www.sherimcconnell.com. Sheri lives in San Antonio, Texas with her husband, their four children, a weenie dog, and two cats.

How to Create Passionate Connections

Do you feel validated? I heard Oprah once say that she thinks everyone on this earth has one basic need—to be validated. I know when I started the National Assn of Women Writers it was because I needed to find other women who loved to write and create like me. I needed to learn with them and laugh with them because I yearned for the validation that I would receive as I in turn validated the writers too. Little did I realize at the time how many women all over the world needed their goals and dreams affirmed just as I did.

I too believe that validation or passionate connections as I like to call them are so important that I have built multiple companies with that vision in mind. Here are a five ways I have learned to create passionate connections and validate others over the last seven years as I grew the NAWW and my other companies (www.sherimcconnell.com). Even if you don’t want to start a business—whatever your goals are—I know you will accomplish them by reaching out to validate others and following the tips below. Enjoy the journey!

Tip 1: Be of Service—Do you know what Web 2.0 is? It is the evolution of the current state of the Internet… the trend of social networking and all of the technology that supports it. I love that the present culture of the Internet has evolved to focus on people and that the technology makes it even easier to be of service. Being of service and helping others feel good about themselves is not only rewarding, it allows you to grow exponentially. You grow internally as a person and externally because your influence will have a farther reach.

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How To Think Big and Lead With Authenticity by Sheri McConnell

Here are six “ways of being” that all authentic and visionary leaders practice. These are leaders that lead with purpose and are strategically creating positive change in the world. These leaders don’t have to focus on the bottom line all the time because their results are so powerful that their business bank account just grows as a result of how attractive their business energy is. Let me explain:

1) Always Be Positive and Grateful

This behavior or this way of being is so powerful and allows you to anchor all lessons and grow from them.  Your ability to see forward movement in every part of your business at every stage is exactly what attracts more success, more money, more exciting experiences, and more amazing people into your world.  No matter what your business or your life looks like today, you must see the lesson in it all and be grateful and welcome it. Genuinely welcome it in. And when you do, you will be rewarded with innovatiive ideas and a ha’s from the universe. On the flip side, if you aren’t positive, you will struggle more just to stand still. Life and business can be effortless or it can be a constant struggle. Know this: You are the core reason whatever you are experiencing right now is happening. Good or bad. Being positive and grateful allows you to see what works and what decisions have been made from ego vs. from the universe that flows through you.
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The Two Most Important Intentions You Can Set In Your Life and Business by Sheri McConnell

Setting intentions is a conscious way of keeping yourself from going through life on autopilot. You can set an intention each morning, before a meeting or appointment, or even before you go to bed to guide your dreams. Marcia Weider defines intention this way: “to have in mind a purpose or plan, to direct the mind, to aim.” By practicing intention setting you can change your behaviors and eventually accomplish all of your goals. Some changes can happen in a moment, like a changed mindset for an instance and other growth requires the continuous practice of intention setting.

I believe that there are two primary intentions you can set that will dramatically affect your life and your business. These intentions can literally create A New Way of Being in your life.

First Intention: Being Authentic

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Pay Attention to the Two M’s and Your Business Will Soar

After ten years of running a 7 figure online business, I have concluded that success can be narrowed down to two specific areas of mastery.

I call them the two M’s — Mindsets and Marketing

And I want to make a BOLD statement here and say that if you can focus your efforts on mastering the Mindsets and the Marketing in your business, you will be successful!

First, let’s discuss the Mindsets…

After years of learning and growing and accomplishing many goals I have set for myself, I decided that no matter what you decide to do in and with your life, your mindsets matters most.
In fact, your mindsets make or break your success in life in three ways:

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How To Behave Like A CEO by Sheri McConnell

One thing I know for sure, is that the sooner a business owner begins to think like a CEO (Chief Entrepreneurial Officer), the faster their business will grow. Below are five ways you can start behaving like a CEO today!

1. Switch from the Big Picture to the Micro Picture Each Day-To run a successful company, you must be able to see the big picture to plan ahead and also be able to see the many parts of your business at a micro level and understand how they relate to each other because all the parts do affect each other. To motivate your team you will need to be able to communicate the big picture and still be able to brainstorm every part of the business with each of your high-level team members as needed. Your ability to be able to successfully switch between Big and Micro Picture in your business will determine your success more than anything else.

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Three Ways To Use The Most Important Business Strategy That Exists

Did you know that there is a under the radar strategy that exists that you can take advantage of right now and it can immediately catapult your success.

That strategy is positioning.

Positioning is the process by which marketers try to create an image or identity in the minds of their target market for its product, brand, or organization.

Re-positioning involves changing the identity of a product, relative to the identity of competing products, in the collective minds of the target market.

At its core, positioning empowers you to take control of your business and use leverage exponentially by leveraging others expertise. The following are three ways you can start changing the way people relate to your company.

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